i want to be in love !!

its 5 in da morning~
i've read koukou debut~
IT'S A NICE MANGA!!! THANKS ALIA!
seriously.. after reading it.... im not finished it yet.. but.. its so sweetttt~ i felt like.. i want to be haruna chan! she's so great~ n a good looking bf too~ im just wondering... if its gonna be areal life drama... dat would be great~
becoz the manga is so sweet..
AHHH! i want to be in love like dat!
ggrr....

owh... last 2 days.. my grandfather passed away....
im kinda felt like its still a dream... i mean... i felt like.. im goin to his house n visit him.. sitting at the kitchen gossipping~its too fast~
but allah luv him more.. and its his time... he suffer too muchh~
every time i think how he passed away.. i felt awful~
when we got the news (it was in da afternoon) i was ate my lunch~ he my uncle told us he was gone. i was like. eh? dat time we were talking bout him.
my heart felt like....
cant describe it...
but i didn't cry.. i just look at my mum n my auntie.....
my lips are sealed.
den we went to his home... which is not that far then our home.. just would take.. 10-15 minutes ride...
everyone was there...
den they decide to burried? LOL
after asar..
so.. dey did mandi the jenazah n all...
and it was last time i would see my late grandfather's face... i just look at him n waited for my turn to kiss for the last time...
den it was my turn..
welll i not really kiss him but.. u know like da makcik2 meet each other... when the cheeks meet together like dat...
it was cold.
n suddenly i thought dat... dis will be the last time i gonna kiss him like dis... the tears coming down from my eyes.. i would nvr kiss him again. like i always do.
seriously.. the tears coming down.. i walk to my uncle's room n took some tissue.. my kazen sis.. cry when she saw my late grandfather's face...
now.. i dun hv my grandparents on my mother's side...
my late grandfather married another... step grandmum...
soo.. i dun hv my grandparents.. dat i close with...
my grandma passed away when i was 7 yrs old. i dun hv a lot of memories with my grandma... but just listen to my mum's stories...
if its was islam calender... last 3 days... 11 yrs.. my grandma or arwah 'wan'(dat wat we called her) passed away... 19 safar? dunno.. cant remember..
n my late grandfather... we called him 'bapak'
hahhaa.. its weird calling ur grandfather 'bapak' right?
but when we were small.. we just followed our mums.. calling.. 'bapak'
i guess we nvr gonna say it again~

-allahyarhammah Raja Teh Khatijah & allahyarham Raja Ahmad Shah-
I will always remember... and love.. may rest in peace.. and be among with solleh and sollehah people..

im sori but usually people said... in malay.. i just write wat ever dat come trough my mind...

• listening to anata ga iru kagiri - Yuna Ito feat Celine Dion
• i readd manga koukou debut with suitable background music!!